Your Heart Still in It?
by 26Rye J
Summary: Buffy fled Sunnydale almost three years ago. Now a single mom, she has to face her past and some hard choices. (Third part in the I Have Loved You Wrong Series).
1. Chapter 1: Up, Up, Up and Down

**This story is the third part after ****_How Much You Really Want_**** in the **_**I Have Loved You Wrong **__**series**__**.**_** It's all one big story that I've broken up in manageable writing chunks. **

**Chapter 1 of ****_Your Heart Still in It?_**** was posted as a preview at the end of **_**IHLYW**_**, so another chapter will be on its way. Though, I gotta say the farther we go in the series the less content I have stored away. **

**If any of ya'll feel good about your editing abilities, I'd love to chat about collaborating. Shoot me a message and we can see about getting these chapters out in a timely fashion.**

**Chapter 1: Up, Up, Up, and Down**

Before digging into his books, Liam planned to feed. Reaching inside the refrigerator, he stopped his hand midair. On the front of the closest blood packet lay a sticky note.

_Check microwave._

Recognizing Anne's writing , he obediently approached the microwave. He figured she'd heated up his blood anticipating his midnight meal time. But instead of a mug of blood, he found something else . . . something he wasn't prepared for.

Inside the microwave sat a bowl of soup with a spoon inside. It was such a normal human thing, and it was for him. He knew as much from the scent of blood wafting towards him.

Not since his parents' home had he enjoyed such a meal. The sight left too stunned to reach out and touch his gift.

Something in his peripheral vision caught his attention.

Anne laid a glass of water and napkin on the table - the perfect human touch.

Tying not to let on how affected he was, he commented on her next activity. "He's a little young for bottle feeding, isn't he?"

Looking up from her seat, nodded, "Four months is early, but he has to depend on someone, and this way, if it's not me, it won't be such a shock."

If he was naive, he'd promise nothing would happen to her, but given the dangers she regularly chose to face, she could die at any time . . . they were too old to pretend otherwise.

He chose to focus on the present. "Thank you for this." He sat down with his gift.

"Thanks to Vinny, time I used to spend sleeping, I now spend on the oddest of things."

"Like pigs blood soup."

"It's the least I could do for you letting me crash here."

"Ha! I drove you here from the hospital then locked you out of your apartment."

She pursed her lips playfully. "Indeed."

Trying some soup, he added, "One of Cordelia's least crazy ideas."

She moved Vincent to her shoulder to burp him. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't."

"Run yourself into the ground taking care of teens, demons, and drooly Vincent." He handed her a napkin to wipe up said drool. "And it's not like I don't have enough room."

That was a true statement. After Wolfram and Hart blew up his last office, Liam rediscovered an old hotel from his past. It was beautiful and roomy enough to guarantee Vincent woke only her at night.

She looked out towards the lobby. "How long do you think it will take to restore it all?"

"At the pace we're going? a lifetime or two."

She rocked her gurgling baby with a smile. "How's the soup?"

"Weird." He quickly elaborated, "Not in a bad way. It's just surreal to eat something from a spoon and enjoy it."

"Good because I was thinking. I mean I found. . ." She looked away nervously.

"What is it?"

"I want to make black pudding- I mean, if you're up for it."

"Could I help?"

"Of course." Her eyes widened with surprise. "I didn't think you'd - but, of course."

"It's just that I remember making it or at least, watching our family cook make it."

The information made her smile. "So you'll keep us on the right track."

"Yeah." He looked down shyly then tried changing the subject. "What time are you picking Faith up?"

"Her bus should get in around five which means my early evening nap is not going to happen."

He took his bowl to the sink and soaked it. "So you should sleep extra now."

Chuckling, she readjusted Vinny's blanket. "You are hilarious."

"Hand him over." He approached her with arms out.

"I'm good."

He kept coming. "He's been fed and burped. Now he's gonna fuss a little, cry a little, and sleep a bit." He bent down and waited expectantly. "You don't need to be up for that."

She slowly delivered up the bundle. "And when are you gonna sleep?"

"Undead remember?" He looked into Vin's eyes and smiled. " I don't need daily shut eye." He readjusted the blanket just like she had. "Now go. Off with you."

She stood and caressed her baby's head then she looked up at Liam. In a different world, him holding her baby could mean something different, something perfect. Going off to bed, she supposed what they had was perfect enough . . . for now.

* * *

Lilly shucked corn while Anne chopped peppers. "Do you ever wonder if they had a thing?"

Anne frowned, "Who."

"Faith and Liam."

"No. I mean, yes I wonder, but I don't think anything happened between them."

Lilly handed her the now naked corn. "He wouldn't he'd let it?"

"If they'd dated, she would have let it slip by now."Anne put the corn in the to-be-chopped pile and put the peppers in a bowl. "Besides, he'd be weird around her if they'd done stuff and he seems entirely comfortable."

"Sometimes casual avoids weird."

"I-I guess."

Lilly handed the now full trash to a kid passing through the kitchen. Quickly, she focused back on the conversation at hand. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let curiosity take control of my mouth. "

She started cutting corn off a cob. "If they tell me they want to try a celibate thing, I should be happy for them. Of course, I'd prefer if he chose someone who wasn't a slayer."

"Feels like a replacement?"

Buffy shrugged. "I don't want to have been just his type of girl. Darla was tiny and blonde, but that didn't bother me because hello? chosen one - emphasis on the singular."

"Until Faith."

"Everybody is entitled to preference, and after meeting Lindsey, Liam certainly thinks he knows mine."

"Which is . . . ."

"Brunette bad boy."

Lilly started laughing. "I'm sorry. I know you said he worked for evil incarnate, but I still can't picture Lindsey as a bad boy. Anne, he had an N Sync lunch box."

"Anyways." Smiling, she bumped Lilly with her side. "If Faith and him decide to couple, I should support it."

Lilly shook her head. "I can't imagine her skipping sex for love."

"Another fact I find comforting."

"Sex without love, though . . . "

Buffy started tossing the vegetable together aggressively. "I could be okay with that, someday, when I'm older and wiser and under magical influences."

Lilly just rolled her eyes and sprinkled in some chopped garlic.

* * *

Hearing a knock on her office door, Anne looked up. "Wesley, you didn't have to come to the shelter. I just called to make sure you'd still be at the office tonight." With baby in one arm and papers in another she waved and offered him a chair.

"Yes, well I was in the area, and your message said you wanted my help with something."

"Yes." She gestured at their surroundings. "_Sanctuary _needs someone respectable to represent it."

"What about Lilly or yourself?"

"High school drop outs who barely got GEDs. Add that to the fact our legal identities are associated with less than legal behavior."

Leaning closer, he lowered his voice. "But you were never arrested for anything."

She lowered her voice too. "I've been a murder suspect twice and was considered a run away until I turned 18."

He leaned back. "I see your point."

"In the beginning, we didn't ask for money, so no one cared who we were. we worked odd jobs and put every pay check into supporting this place." She began softly bouncing Vince. "Lindsey changed all that. He drafted proposals and put his name on them so between government funding and private donors, _Sanctuary _was covered."

"That he changed things so quickly is quite impressive."

"He was -is an impressive guy." Pulling herself out of memories, she put the papers on the desk so she could hold Vince with both hands. "But now it's time to renew things and meet people, and Lil and I aren't who they are expecting."

Wesley leaned forward again. "What are you asking exactly?"

"Will you, Wesley Windom Pryce, become a partner in _Sanctuary_ and be your educated, classy, socially acceptable self on paper and in person so we can keep our funding?"

His jaw dropped a little. "You're offering me a job."

"You offered me one." She tilted her head. "And in this case, I actually have the power to hire you - being the head boss and all."

Sitting back, he huffed, "I don't think it's your record which keeps the donors away."

She muttered, "Right- nice face." She smiled prettily. "Please?"

He observed, "I do already have a job."

"I know, and this wouldn't take much time at all. I handle the paperwork and set up donor events and you just sign and show up."

"And be my classy British self."

She shifted the baby so he faced Wesley. "Vincent will love you forever."

He tried very hard to scowl but couldn't make it stick. "Soon, that child will outgrow these boyish charms and be useless as means of persuasion."

She whispered in Vinny's ear, "Show him your baby blues." He breath tickled his cheek making him giggle. "You giving your toothless smile?"

"Gums are visible." Wesley furrowed his brow just as Lilly paused in the doorway. "He say yes yet?"

Looking to the ceiling, he sighed dramatically, "I'll be your front man."

Lil blew baby a kiss. "Thank you Vinny."

She walked away leaving Wesley with mouth agape.

"I agree to help and she thanks the gurgling child."

Moving from her seat, she placed a hand on his shoulder and kissed his cheek. "Thank you Wes."

He tried to contain his blush. "You're welcome."

While placing Vince in the office crib she murmured to him, "We've still got the charm."

Wes couldn't argue that.

* * *

"Can I talk to Anne?"

"Just let me get her." Liam held the phone to his chest. "ANNE!"

Wiping at spit up on her shirt, Anne walked into the lobby. Before taking the phone, she muttered, "You are so lucky he's a deep sleeper."

"Faith for you."

She rolled her eyes and sighed. "Is this you postponing your trip again?" She continued wiping at spit up. "Cause I gotta tell you, Vinny is getting messier with every day - not cuter."

"I don't think I should Sunnydale now."

"Stupid hellmouth - it has no respect for a girl's godmother duties."

Faith didn't reply right away. "When was the last time you talked to Joyce?"

"Couple weeks ago." Buffy frowned growing concerned. "Why?"

"She's been getting bad headaches for a while and then this week, she went to a doctor. He wants her to stay overnight for a test. Joyce plays it like it's no big, but I think I should stay with her, you know?"

"Are you in the house now?"

"Yeah, she's napping upstairs."

"I want you to go in the living room and look at the day planner in the desk."

"Okay. . ."

"Now look to the day she went to the appointment. What doctor does it say she saw?

"Sorry, I can't say this name."

"Spell it for me?" Buffy moved to the front desk for a paper and pen. "And what test does it say she's having later?"

"A kit scan."

"Spell it."

"C-T?"

Stepping behind her, Angel put a hand on her shoulder. She tried to beat back her worry with deep breathing. "Okay Faith. You did good."

"What does this mean?"

"It means you were right to stay with her." She leaned back into Angel. "And you're going to need support. You both are."

"You're not saying. . . "

"First, I'm going to talk to mom, then I'll know what I'm saying."

"You and me in Sunnydale, how crazy would that be?"

Closing her eyes, she shook her head. "Almost unthinkable."

"Wait, I think I hear her moving around."

"Can you put her on?"

"Yeah, hold on."

Buffy turned in Angel's arms and looked up at him. Her eyes glistened; she sighed, "Is this really happening?"


	2. Chapter 2: Believe in the Journey

**Chapter 2: Believe in the Journey**

Buffy put a hairbrush in her bag and a stake in her jacket. "You sure you're okay with this?"

"Which part?" Angel sat on her bed bouncing Vinny. "You leaving, Lilly staying here, or Joyce moving in?"

She stepped back from packing. "This is too much."

Angel spoke gently, "I'm fine with all of it. I support all of it."

"I'd ask Lilly to take him, but" She reached for Vinny's hand. "There's demons and burglars and normal stupid kids looking for trouble." Vinny grabbed onto a finger and started sucking.

"This is his home. I'm glad Lilly is staying here while you're away. He shouldn't have to leave."

"And my mom?" Her voice cracked. "This plan is absolutely insane."

"We fixed up another guest room so someone could stay here; we just didn't know who yet."

Holding Vincent's hand, she looked at Angel with sad eyes. "I'm taking over your life."

"You've been doing_ that_ since I first saw you." He smirked.

"Angel."

"Liam, remember?"

She flopped face down on the bed. "I don't know what I'm doing." She turned to her side. "What if I'm making a mistake?"

"What's got you worried most?"

"Right now?" She sighed, "Leaving Vincent."

He watched Vin try and eat his own hand. "Sunnydale's no place for a baby."

"Or his mommy or grandmommy." She turned onto her back.

"You're not making a mistake."

She replied with grumbling noises.

He stood up with Vincent. "I bet Sunny's already pulled up the car."

"Okay." She pulled herself up too. "There's extra milk in the fridge, and you have Sunny's number if for some reason you can't reach me."

"Yes."

Walking to the gall, she zipped her bag. "And Cynthia's shift let's out at 11 this week so if you show up at 2, she'll have already walked home by then."

"Noted."

"And try to protect his fingernails from Cody's nail polish." She stopped at the top of the stairs. "I know she thinks it's cute, but baby hands go in baby mouths and ingesting chemicals is never cute."

He nodded.

She took one step down the stair before turning back around. "And don't let her talk you into doing toes either. He's discovered feet and pretty soon those will be in his mouth too."

Smiling, he pointed straight ahead. "Go."

Lilly, Cordelia, and Wesley stood in lobby.

Cordy frowned up at the pair. "You talking about me again."

Buffy said "nope" the same time Angel answered, "always."

"At least the baby likes me." She came toward him with cheek-pinching fingers at the ready.

While looking at Angel, Buffy accepted a goodbye hug from Lilly.

He promised over Cordy's head, "I'll protect the feet."

Nodding, she turned to Lilly. "You gonna be okay while I'm gone?"

"Gunn and I have everything handled."

Wes stepped forward. "What measures have you taken to maintain anonymity?"

"Almost none. I'm leaving a lot of it Faith."

"Faith the girl?"

"She's more familiar with the area and the dangers. At this point, she's lived there longer than I ever did."

Lilly smiled nostalgically. "You're no longer Sunnydale's slayer."

Cordelia grimaced. "Scary thought."

Buffy looked at Angel. "Can you follow me out? I want to say goodbye to Vincent before I go."

"Sure."

Securing her bag, she marched into darkness without glancing back.

Sunny met her from the car and packed her bag away.

Turning around, she found Angel and Vinny waiting at the gate. She reached out her arms to hold her baby.

"Be good for everybody, okay?" She smiled. "I'm going to take the drooling as a yes." She snuggled him close and breathed in his baby scent. Slowly, she handed him back, but she didn't step away. Hovering over Vincent, she rested her head on Angel's chest.

He used the opportunity to breath _her_ in.

She mumbled, "Mom needs me." She reminded herself, "She needs me to get in that car and be strong."

He sheltered her with silence and felt her lean into him more.

Then abruptly, she pulled back. Sniffling softly, she set her shoulders straight. "Okay then. See you in a couple days."

She opened the passenger door and told Sunny to start the car.

Angel watched the jeep drive out of sight before returning inside.

As he reached the stairs, Lilly called out, "Where you going?"

"Diaper change."

She approached with reaching arms. "I'll take care of that. Come here little buddy."

He stepped back. "No, it's fine. I got it."

Lilly laughed. "Don't be silly." She moved forward and took Vinny. "This poopy man won't interfere with your work at all while she's gone. Promise." With baby on hip, she walked up the stairs, down the hall, and out of his sight.

She didn't realize she'd just taken his last connection to Buffy. Forlorn, he gazed at the empty staircase.

"Come on big guy." Cordelia slapped him on the back. "It's about time we got back to serious hero work."

Wesley raised a brow. "Is that why you packed baby costumes and a camera?"

"Anyone can see he's got star potential." She glanced at the front door. "She'll thank me when the money starts rolling in."

"Hero work." Angel continued staring up the stairs. "Right, so what's first?"

Wesley pulled out a pile of case folders. He opened a green one and smiled. "You're going to like this one."

Angel wasn't intrigued but somehow managed to pull himself away from the stairs. "Okay, let's see what we've got."

* * *

Buffy turned from the window to her quiet companion. "Thanks for coming with me."

Hands on the wheel, Sunny shrugged. "I've never actually done a road trip before." He pointed at the back seat. "There's snacks if you're hungry and all the doctor research you left on your desk."

She glanced back at the messy pile. "You're a good road trip buddy."

Gathering courage, he gripped the steering wheel tighter. "Still planning on moving kids to the hotel?"

"There are a bunch of legal and financial hurtles to get over first. We'd need a grant to afford restoration and then Angel's supernatural place of business would become subject to health inspections and regular social work visits . . . complicated is an understatement."

He pressed, "But. . ."

"But the space would be nice. _Sanctuary_ is usually at capacity and every time Gunn sends us someone, he meets more on the street needing help. He talks like abandoned warehouses are some kind of waiting room, but they're filling up faster than we get people out of the shelter and stable on their own."

"There's a lot of need out there."

"We can't help everybody, but Angel, Lilly and Il, we think this is a way to help more."

"Angel part of the team now?"

She smirked a little. "If we move into his place, he will be."

Sunny didn't reply.

"Nothing is changing right now. These are big dreams for future plans." She returned to watching the passing scenery. "Vinny will be long out of diapers before I start attempting any life changing projects."

Her lack of urgency calmed his concerns; it didn't erase them. "But you want it."

"I want more and more every day." She murmured, "It's my curse."

He readjusted his grip on the wheel and tried to relax in his seat. "So what's the deal with this Sunnydale place anyways?"

* * *

Standing outside her room, Lilly watched Angel gaze at a sleeping Vincent. "You're not a normal male that's for sure."

Embarrassed, he stepped back with hands up. "I was just saying good night."

He expected her to chastise him for invasion of privacy. She didn't.

Instead, she asked, "Did you ever have kids, you know, before?"

"When I was human, I didn't want them, and after, well, the topic never came up." He moved nearer the cradle.

"Even with Buffy?"

"Not until Buffy." Remembering the conversation made him smile.

_"Uh, maybe someday, in the future, when I'm done having a life, but... " Her eyes danced with innocence_. _"Right now kids would be just a little too much to deal with."_

_"I wouldn't know."_ _He struggled with how to tell her._ _"I don't... Well, you know, I, I can't."_

_"Oh."_ _She glanced away. "That's okay, um... I-I figured there were all sorts of things vampires couldn't do. You know, like work for the Telephone Company, or volunteer for the Red Cross, or... have little vampires."_

_"So you don't think about the future?"_

_"No."_

_He swallowed. "Never?"_

_"No" She sounded so sure._

_"You really don't care what happens a year from now? Five years from now?"_

_"Angel, when I look into the future, a-all I see is you. All I want is you."_

_He tried to memorize the moment, for it was perfect; she was perfect. "I know the feeling."_

"I get it."

Startled, he looked over and found Lilly leaning against a wall.

"I thought she was crazy to put you in her will. Vampires and babies shouldn't go together, but you're so comfortable with him."

"She wrote a will?"

"It's a parent thing not a slayer thing," she reassured. "It says if something happens to her, you and I are supposed to raise him. Technically, that'd make you a guardian, but calling you his guardian Angel is a little cheesy. Take your pick of uncle or godfather."

Lilly used this guest room often. On the dress near the crib sat a picture of Buffy and Lilly and Vin a few hours after his birth. He stared at that Buffy's face. "She never told me that."

"I'm surprised she tells you anything." Realizing how hostile she sounded, she glanced away. "I'm sorry. It's none of my business."

His eyes stayed glued to the picture. "Contrary to what Anne may think, bringing up the past won't break us ."

She scowled. "Remembering that night isn't good for her." While Angel stared at the photo, she scrutinized him. "I can tell when she's been thinking about it because I'll find her staring at the walls going over and over how horrible she is, how much pain she causes."

"Buffy broods?"

"Those thoughts are still there." Her words drew his eyes to hers. "She pushes them aside to help us, but if there's one thing that could send her down a shame spiral, it's you."

"I don't want that."

"She still wishes you never came to LA." She watched the words wound him. "But I'm glad you did." Standing up straight, she moved to his side. "Someday she's going to save you and realize that that's the way life is supposed to be and everything else is just what's wrong with the world - not her."

They watched the picture together and remembered that day. With Vincent in her arms, Buffy's smile glowed more than it ever had during pregnancy.

Angel mused, "Godfather."

"Maybe father someday." She shrugged at his guffaw. "It could happen."

"It really couldn't."

"All this playing house hasn't got you dreaming of a life with her? And here I thought you were a true believer."

He looked down at Vincent. "Hope is a powerful thing."

Her head tilted. "You mean dangerous."

He didn't reply.

"Anne's not the only one who's needs to work out some issues."


	3. Chapter 3: The Lengths We Go

**Chapter 3: The Lengths We Go**

"I haven't seen you in this house since . . ." Joyce swallowed. "And now you're all grown up taking care of kids yourself."

Sitting on her old couch, Buffy nodded. "Sunny here used to be one of those kids, but now he helps run the shelter." She smiled with pride. "Seeing him in his own place is surreal."

Looking at the floor, he shrugged. "I'm crashing at her old apartment."

Joyce turned to Buffy. "And now you're living. . ."

"At Lia- Angel's new property. We're hoping you'll consider coming to live there too."

Leaning against the wall, Faith added, "Each of you could take a whole floor, and there'd still be room."

"I appreciate the thought but I don't need constant care." She gently reassured, "You're overreacting."

"Probably." Buffy wore her own motherly smile "I miss seeing you, and I want to be a part of your life again and have you a part of mine."

"Can I see the picture again?"

Buffy passed over the wallet baby photo. While Joyce gazed at Vinny, Buffy glanced around taking note of the changes. "For a lot of reasons, we can't be together here." She caught Joyce's gaze. "Please, come back with me where we'll be safe."

"Alright, but I won't be the pestering mother-in-law. I'll find a place of my own."

Faith grinned. "Just wait till you see the place first."

"And Angel's okay with this?" Joyce put down her coffee.

"It was his idea."

Bumping shoulders with Buffy, Faith added. "Angel doesn't have a family so he's trying to horn in on B's."

"We picked up a small trailer on the way down as well as many boxes." Buffy nodded to Sunny. "Faith can drive down whatever is left."

Watching the boy head for the car, Joyce frowned. "You're not worried about being seen?"

Buffy took her hand. "This is more important."

Looking into the others' eyes, they found the same thought: tragedy tore them apart now; now, tragedy was reuniting them.

Joyce sighed. "It's good to see you again."

Over the lump in her throat, Buffy replied, "It's good to see you too."

* * *

Faith taped up a box and added it to the pile. "You really think we can get this packed in two days?"

Smiling, Sunny shook his head.

"What?"

He bubble-wrapped up the jewelry box. "Slayers kill monsters no problem but leave packing to you two and no one would ever move." He passed her the wrap.

"Doesn't sound so bad."

Watching her pop the bubbles, he frowned. "You gonna miss havin' a roommate?"

"Joyce isn't a gal pal. She's more like . . ."

"Family."

Keeping her eyes down, she nodded. "Just kinda wish I had a replacement slayer, you know?"

"Yeah."

"Guess we can't all get as lucky as B."

Sunny frowned at the comment but didn't reply. Outside Joyce's room, Buffy and her mom were having their own awkward moment.

"Are you sure Angel's a good influence around the baby? He didn't seem that stable to me."

Buffy carried three boxes of files down the stairs. "He wasn't then. He's come a long way." She glanced back at her. "We both have."

"He was obsessed with you." She lowered her voice to whisper. "He _stalked_ you."

"And I killed him. I'd say we're even." Not hearing her mother's steps, Buffy stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned around. "Nothing I say is going to make my life make sense to you." Her mom wore a look of shock. "Do you still want to be a part of it?"

Still stunned, Joyce nodded.

Buffy put down the boxes and walked back up for more. Pausing, she added softly, "I forgave him the unforgivable, and he did the same for me."

"I just want you safe."

"I promise we are. When you see him with Vinny, you'll understand. There's no one I trust more with him."

Joyce's shoulders lost some of their tension. "Alright."

"I've made a lot of mistakes, but I'm a good mom."

"I believe it." They started up the stairs together.

"I can't wait for Vincent to meet his grandma."

"Grandma sounds much too old. Is nanna taken - by his other grandma I mean?"

Buffy's step nearly faltered. "Nanna is all yours."

She smiled to herself. "Nanna Joyce."

Buffy was glad the name made her mom happy because little else about her life would. At the end of the day, she was a single mom working multiple jobs and shacking with her ex. Nothing about that could possibly make her mother proud.

* * *

"So this is where you've been hiding out." Cordelia watched Angel feed Vincent on Buffy's bed. "You worked all day and now your spending your night being Mr. Mom. Isn't that why Lilly's here?"

"She works during the day too. Why should she get all the baby time?"

"Are you whining?"

"No."

"Buffy asked her to watch him so you could have a break from baby duties." She tilter her head. "But you don't want a break." When no denial came, she frowned. "Why didn't you say something before she left?"

He grumbled. "I didn't think Lilly would be so - on top of things."

"Gunn's stories do make her sound flaky."

"It's like she has a special baby sense. She's there before he even starts to cry."

She took a seat next to him. "Maybe she has superpowers or _maybe_ she read the schedule Buffy left her."

He stroked Vinny's cheek. "I don't want him to forget about me."

"I can only imagine how his mom is handing the separation." She studied Angel's unwrinkled brow. "You're doing well with her gone . . . suspiciously well."

He shrugged.

She spotted signs of a smile. "What?"

"This is where she wants to be. She'll do whatever it takes to get back to him." He whispered to Vincent, "She won't disappear."

"You worry about that a lot, don't you?" She put a hand on his leg. "Angel, she's not going anywhere. This is her home now."

Looking around at Buffy's nick nacks and pictures, he smiled thoughtfully. "It is."

"There you are!" Lilly appeared in the doorway. "If you're going to keep taking him, at least wear a bell so I can find you." She approached to pick Vinny up.

Sheepishly, he handed him over. "Sorry." Cordelia thought he was more sorry for to give Vincent up than for stealing him.

Lilly turned to her. "You'd think he'd enjoy getting his life back instead of sabotaging baby monitors."

Cordelia gave him a side glance. "You didn't." His silence made her smirk.

Rolling her eyes, Lilly bounced Vincent on her hip, "Anne must have constant panic attacks living here. " She left with a huff, "Baby thief."

Without Vinny in his arms, Angel looked bereft.

Cordy squeezed his leg again. "Buffy will be home real soon for him and for you."

He didn't look convinced.

Annoyed by his humility, she insisted, "You belong together; she knows that." She stood to leave. "And so do you."

Pondering her words, he lay back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. "Wonder what Vincent thinks about it."

* * *

Sitting on her back porch steps, Buffy gazed at the stars and savored the quiet. The door creaked, but she didn't turn. "They're brighter here than in LA."

Taking a seat on the step beside her, Faith looked up. "I never really noticed."

"Neither did I."

"The trailer is all packed and your mom seems up for the trip."

Buffy stayed quiet.

"I guess this is your last time here. With Angel and Joyce in LA, there isn't a reason to come back."

"He said once that I never really left." She continued looking up. "Maybe now I can."

Faith chuckled, "No worries about me and the hellmouth?"

"No."

"You either believe in me more than anyone else or you totally want me dead."

Buffy smiled a little. "Which do you think?"

She sighed, "I've got a lot to live up to."

Leaving the stars, her eyes fell to the ground between them. "You want me to say it. Alright," Their eyes met. "If you need me, I've got your back, always."

Her solemn promise made Faith lower her eyes. "Thanks."

Buffy nodded. "Whatever you decide here, you'll always have a place with us."

"Yo Anne, ready to go?" Sunny came around the side yard. "You're mom's in the jeep."

"I'll be right there."

Sunny turned back as Buffy stood. "You coming?"

Faith shook her head. "Joyce and I had our goodbye."

"Okay, don't be a stranger." She ruffled her hair playfully. "Vincent will be expecting a visit."

"Yeah, yeah."

"So will Joyce."

Faith nodded gravely.

"Bye Faith."

She stared at the ground. Sitting on the porch step, Faith waited till she heard the car start up and listened as it moved past hearing range. Only then did she whisper, "bye."

Joyce looked at Buffy through the rear-view mirror. "So tell me about Vincent's father."

"He's not really in the picture."

She turned to Sunny. "Did you know him?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Mom." She felt sixteen again.

"You can be secretive about boyfriends but I think I deserve to know something about the father of your firstborn."

Before Buffy could think of a good response, Sunny blurted, "He's a dork."

"Sunny."

He shrugged at the mirror. "Sorry Anne, but you know it's true. You're boy literally whistles while he works."

"Not all the time."

He looked away from the road to glance at Joyce, "If Vincent turns a little nerdy, blame it on his pops."

Buffy rested her head against the window. "This is going to be a long drive."

They passed the "now leaving Sunnydale" sign, but not before passing something else, a stoplight by a bar.

Spike stepped out of it just as Sunny slowed for the red. The trailer was hard to miss - as was the familiar face. "Where you goin' Joyce?"

When the light turned green, the jeep continued on the road out of town. Spike turned to a nearby bar patron opening his car. Putting on his vamp face, he growled, "Keys. Now."

Terrified, the human dropped his keys and backed away. "What are you?"

"Curious mate and maybe, just a bit excited." Starting the car, he glanced at the still quivering man."I've still got it." His smirk lasted the whole way out of town.

* * *

**So, what ya thinkin? Any predictions on who's coming back or future happenings?**


	4. Chapter 4: Questions which Echo

**Chapter 4: Questions which Echo**

Sunny opened the car door for Joyce.

She got out with wide eyes. "Someone actually lives year?"

Smiling, Buffy looped her arm through hers. "Come on."

Sunny grabbed some luggage while they entered the gate.

They passed the garden and fountain in silence until finally reaching the door.

"Mom, this is our home."

Walking through the doorway, Joyce gasped at the interior.

Angel came down the stairs with Vincent in his arms. "You're back."

"How's my boy?" Buffy grinned at Vinny's gurgle bubbles.

"He _was_ ready for sleepy time." Angel came up and smiled at Joyce. "Hi Mrs. Summers. Was the drive okay?"

She nodded and leaned towards Vince. "He looks just like you as a baby."

Buffy smiled and took him in her arms. "For his sake, I hope that's where the resemblance ends."

As Sunny came inside, Angel took the bags. "I'll put these in her room."

Sunny glanced around. "Where's Lilly?"

Joyce frowned. "That's your business partner, right?"

Buffy nodded. "You'll like her."

Angel passed them with luggage. "She's sleeping."

"Angel!"

He cringed. "Or not."

"Angel!" Lilly leaned over the balcony. "Whoa, people." She hurried down the stairs. "Is this your mom?"

Buffy moved Vince to her hip. "Mom this is Lilly. Lilly this is my mom."

"It's nice to meet you Mrs. Steele."

Buffy whispered, "I'll catch you up later."

Joyce nodded and shook the girls hand. "Is everything alright? You sounded upset." She glanced at Angel.

Lilly shrugged. "Vincent's safe and accounted for, so I guess it's fine." She turned to Buffy. "I came this close to putting an anti-vampire spell on Vinny's crib."

"Why? Wait, you can do that?"

Angel appeared at the balcony. "She could, but that wouldn't be very good guest behavior."

Lilly glared up at him. "Neither are the others spells I know."

Raising a brow, Buffy turned her attention to Vinny. "Looks like I came back just in time."

Sunny looked at Joyce. "You must be tired from the drive."

Buffy stroked her shoulder. "Yeah mom, you should get some sleep."

"What about you?"

She smiled. "Me too. Let's show you your room."

Joyce nodded to Lilly and Sunny. "It was good to meet you."

Sunny waved. "See you around Mrs. Summers."

Lily frowned and stayed with Sunny for an explanation as well as a trip summary.

While her friends caught up, Buffy walked her mom to a room near her own. "We finished fixing up this room a couple weeks ago. The property hasn't been owned in a while so we're restoring it one piece at a time."

"I see what Faith meant about space."

"The whole Summers clan could move in and we'd still have room."

Joyce sat down on the bed. "I didn't realize how tired I was."

Trying to hide her worry, she sat beside her, "It's been a big day."

"Indeed, it has."

"I'll let you rest." She smiled. "Sheets are clean so all you need is to climb inside."

"Can I hold him?"

"He'd like that." She carefully placed Vince in his Nana's arms.

"Hello Vincent. You are a handsome young man."

"This is your Nana Joyce." Buffy took his little hand in hers. "She's the lady I've been telling you about."

"He's beautiful Buffy."

She looked at her mom's smile. "We're glad you're here."

"I never thought I'd see the day. . ." Her eyes shined with tears of awe.

Buffy's heart squeezed for a different reason.

* * *

Watching Vincent play on his blanket, an exhausted Buffy lay on the floor.

Angel peaked in the door. "Do you want me to take him so you can rest?"

"I've been away too long already. I can stay up till he falls asleep."

He started closing the door to give her privacy.

"Angel?"

"Yeah?"

"I-" She looked up. "Will you-"

"What is it?"

"I-" She shook her head. "Just tired I guess."

"How about I stay still_ you _fall asleep, so he doesn't get stranded on a blanket."

She smiled sleepily.

Taking that as permission, Angel settled down against the trunk on the other side of Vince.

"How long _can_ you stay up?"

He smirked. "As long as it takes."

Groaning, she turned her blushing face to the floor.

He tickled Vinny with one hand. "She doesn't think that's funny."

She choked on a laugh and felt her eyes watering. Feeling Angel's concern, she rubbed her face with her hand to keep back any tears. "It's been a long couple of days."

"You did a good thing going back for her."

"I shouldn't have kept her out for so long." She rolled onto her back. "She asked about Vince's father." She watched Vinny play with Angel's hand. "I wanted to lie so badly. That's how much I screwed up; I'd rather say I slept with a deadbeat, than admit I married someone she never met and started a family without telling her."

"I'm sure she understands you didn't do it to hurt her."

"If I told her about Lindsey, she'd want to meet him and see me and-." Rolling to her side, she reached out to Vincent. "I wasn't ready for that, so I didn't say anything." She looked at him with guilt in her eyes. "It couldn't hurt her if she didn't know."

"Did she say she was mad at you?"

She shook her head.

"Disappointed?"

"No."

"Then maybe it's best you focus on making the most of the time you two have now."

With her hand over his heart, she watched Vinny's eyelids droop closed. "When will I stop hurting the ones I love?"

Watching her watch Vincent, he remained quiet. Having hurt everyone he'd ever loved, he was no stranger to her question; he didn't have an answer either.

She placed her hand over his before getting up and putting Vincent to bed.

He'd listened to her fears and regrets, and apparently, that was enough. She could be strong knowing her secrets were safe. Her very own sanctuary, he'd defend her thoughts and feelings against judgments.

* * *

Lindsey sat with his guitar on the window sill. Gazing at the cloudy sky, he sang:

_Livin' with me, it ain't easy  
but I do it every day  
sometimes even now  
I wanna run away  
but there you are  
you're tryin' to please me  
and you stand your ground  
that's more than I deserve_

He smiled at the sliver of sunlight.

_I've taken more than I've been given  
I've taken for granted this life I'm livin'  
I don't know why heaven above  
blessed me with your sweet love  
I know I never tell you what you're worth  
'Cause it's more than I deserve_

Turning, he found Monica in the doorway.

"That's beautiful. Is it yours?"

He picked up a wrinkled piece of paper. "It's in my handwriting, but for the life of me, I can't remember writing it."

"Must have been a while ago."

"Ashamed to say I forgot the girl too." He shook his head with a sheepish smile. "Guess love didn't make a lasting impression."

"Lucky girl. She got your heart before law stole it away."

He put the paper back in his guitar case. "More likely I made her up."

She looked at the mess of papers in there. "What else can you play?"

"Whatever you like darlin'." He plucked a few chords. "I'm in the mood to sing."

"What brought this on?"

"Remember when I told you about my ESP moments?"

Nodding, she chuckled, "You mean your crazy reaction to work overload?"

He held back a smirk. "Since I cut back my hours, I don't get them much, but I don't know; something about today . . ."

"And this has nothing to do with your new assignment at work."

He rolled his eyes. "I'm not having a nervous breakdown."

"Good cuz I like your apartment too much to leave you."

He mock growled.

"Where do you think all these feelings are leading to anyway?" She grinned. "You already got the girl."

His eyes didn't share his smile. "I don't know what I'm looking for. I'm hoping I'll know it when I see it."

She took his guitar from him and set it down. "You'll see happiness isn't something you chase after." She climbed into his lap as he wrapped his arms around her.

"I should lure it to me, huh?"

"You can't find it Lindsey. It finds you."

He kissed her. "I can hardly wait."

* * *

**Next week, Buffy's will find her life further complicated; Joyce, Lindsey, and Spike, oh my!**

**The song in this chapter was written by the Christian Kane, the actor who played Lindsey. It's called More Than I Deserve. **


	5. Chapter 5: Psychic's Nightmare

**Chapter 5: Psychic's Nightmare**

Joyce stood in _Sanctuary _as it buzzed with activity. "This is amazing Buffy."

She smiled softly, "Anne remember?"

"Oh, right." Joyce blushed. "Of course. I'll try not to forget."

"And thank you." Bouncing Vinnny on her hip, she glanced around. "Lilly and I put everything we have into this place."

Carrying a new sofa with Dan, Gunn yelled at Raquel and Bernie to pick up the trash in the living room.

"Does he work here too?"

"I'm not Gunn's boss, but he certainly works here. He helped Lil run the place while I was gone."

Lilly came in with glasses of ice tea. "Here you go Mrs Ste-ummers."

Joyce smiled sympathetically. "How about you just call me Joyce."

Lilly sighed with relief. "Has she given you the tour yet?''

"I don't know." She looked to Buffy. "I've certainly seen a lot of it."

"Mom is still floored I actually have a job."

"I never said that."

Buffy used dancing fingers to make Vinny smile. "Mommy's no slacker."

Lilly smiled. "Your daughter is the smartest person I know." She waved her hand at the room "None of this could have happened without her."

Gunn stood next to Lilly. "Glad you made it back unscathed."

"How do you feel about running things another night?"

"What's up?"

"Angel asked me along on a research trip, so Lilly's on Vincent duty. Sunny will be here to help you though."

As Gunn nodded, Joyce whispered. "You're not slaying with him are you?"

Gunn scowled. "She better not." Lilly put a hand on his back.

"Like I said, I'm just his secretary." Buffy nodded at her mom . "I've been taking it real easy since Vincent was born."

Gunn let out the breath he was holding. "This place is plenty work."

Lilly rubbed circles on his back as he put his arm around her. "_Sanctuary_ isn't about saving the world. We're just doing a little good where we can."

Sunny stepped in from the porch. "Anne, I need your take on something."

"Do not tell me we got tagged again." She handed Vince to her mom. "Oh for the days of violent solutions."

Lilly called after her, "Gemma's got the cleaning supplies." She turned to Joyce and gestured. "Let's sit. Ask me anything."

Buffy walked down the stoop with Sunny. "What do ya got?"

"Remember the car tailing us last night?"

"Hard to miss."

He nodded at the homeless demon across the street. "Willard said he saw a driver parked here about an hour ago. Sounds like the same."

"What'd he look like?"

"Windows were all painted black."

"So a vampire followed me back from Sunnydale."

Sunny gave her a moment to come up with a plan.

"Tell the group to do extra patrols here for the next couple days."

"What about the hotel?"

"Lil put every protection and anti-violence spell she knows on it. Vince and my mom will be fine as long as they don't go inviting any strangers in."

"Lilly knows better."

"She does." She worried her bottom lip. "I'm betting all this vamp has is a hunch. As long as we behave normally and stay alert, we should be able to get him before he signals anyone."

"Unless he already has."

She nodded. "Don't tell the others. I want to hunt this one myself."

He frowned.

"This is too important to trust to someone else." She touched his arm. "Can you trust me?"

He pursed his lips. "Your mom will be pissed if you die."

She took that at his way of saying he trusted her to the handle this alone. "Thank you."

* * *

"You should sing too." Angel held the door open for Buffy. "It'd be a good way to find out if you're cursed."

Cordy frowned. "I thought we were here for work stuff."

Wesley frowned too. "Why would Anne be cursed?"

"I never said I was." She glared at Angel. "We're here for your questions not mine."

Cordy made big eyes at him. "You'll pick something short right?"

Leading the way into Caritas, Buffy glanced back. "Why haven't I heard you sing before?"

Wesley grimaced. "Count yourself fortunate."

"Just for that I'm going with _Stairway to Heaven_."

"Don't even jo-"

Cordelia's jaw dropped a little. "Whoa."

"Lindsey?"

Onstage sat Anne's ex husband with his guitar.

_She's pretty as a picture  
She is like a golden ring  
Circles me with love and laughter  
And I can't feel a thing  
_

Lorne came over. "Isn't he fabulous?"

Angel clarified, "_He _comes here."

"He comes all the time - one of our favorite regulars."

Cordelia stood entranced. "Wow, I totally get it now. I'd make babies with him too."

Angel coughed, "Cordelia."

"What? I'm approving. That's what friends do."

Buffy bumped his arm. "I'm used to her approval by now."

_The sky's gonna open  
People gonna pray and crawl  
It's gonna rain down fire  
It's gonna burn us all_

Enjoying the music, Wesley added, "I don't disapprove."

She looked over. "Now I'm uncomfortable."

Watching others in the bar sway to the tune, Angel nodded his agreement.

_The sky's gonna open  
People gonna pray and sing  
I can't feel_

Lorne smiled, "You going to grace us with your voice sugar lumps?"

She watched Lindsey approach the group. "Sorry Lorne, not tonight."

Lorne's disappointment faded when Lindsey shook his hand. "New song?"

"And a new face." Lindsey smiled at Buffy.

Angel stepped in. "Shouldn't you be asking Lorne your question?"

Ignoring him, Lindsey asked her, "You sing?"

Cordelia interrupted, "No one should go up after that performance."

Wesley nodded. "You are quite talented."

Lorne patted Lindsey on the back. "Sorry kid, I didn't see anything different."

He didn't seem surprised. Shrugging, he turned back to Buffy. "I usually play more than one. How 'bout you sing a cover with me? It'll be easy."

Shaking her head, she felt Lorne push her forward. "She'd love to. I've been trying to get her up there for ages."

Seeing the men around her stiffen, Linds added, "Don't worry boys. I'm just helping out a newcomer. Unless one of you'd like to back her up?"

Cordelia guffawed.

Before Wesley and Angel could argue, Lorne herded Lindsey and Buffy onstage.

Angel looked over, "How will his firm react to this?"

"As per the contract, it's their blunder - not hers." Wesley shrugged helplessly, "Wolfram and Hart took full responsibility over separation. "

Cordelia continued to moon over Lindsey in casual wear. "More important question, what are they going to sing?"

Lindsey's smile was friendly and reassuring as he set up a mike and stool for her. "Got a name?"

"Anne."

He smiled into his microphone, "Folks, this is my new friend Annie. She's going to be helpin' out on this next one."

With nerves in her belly, she nodded she was okay to start.

He plucked those unforgettable notes and she sang.

_You got a fast car  
I want a ticket to anywhere.  
Maybe we make a deal  
Maybe together we can get somewhere._

_Any place is better  
Starting from zero got nothing to lose.  
Maybe we'll make something  
But me myself I got nothing to prove._

While Lindsey sang the next verse, Cordelia shrugged. "She doesn't suck."

Neither Wesley nor Angel made comment -both too focused on the interplay between performers. With smiles and glances, they sang to each other as much as they did for their audience.

_You got a fast car  
But is it fast enough so we can fly away?  
We gotta make a decision.  
We leave tonight or live and die this way._

Apparently, Linds meant what he said about backing her up. Even when they sang together, he kept his voice reigned in. The mood between them shifted from serious to playful with the lyrics:

_I remember we were driving, driving in your car  
The speed so fast I felt like I was drunk.  
City lights lay out before us  
And your arm felt nice wrapped 'round my shoulder.  
And I had a feeling that I belonged  
And I had a feeling I could be someone, be someone, be someone._

Wesley observed, "They look . . ."

"Coupley," Cordy finished for him.

Wesley corrected, "Like they've done this before."

Coming over, Lorne whispered furiously, "Why didn't you tell me they were a psychic's nightmare?"

Angel glanced at him. "Not enjoying the show?"

"My head hurts; my heart hurts. The only things that _aren't _sore are my ears."

Wesley adjusted his glasses. "Serves you right for meddling."

"That's why our cowboy's future is blank." He shook his head with disgust. "His bosses literally erased his destiny."

Cordelia squealed, "You can't tell _him_ that."

"Sweetie, I won't have to."

Following his gaze, Angel watched the two onstage.

Buffy sang the last verse right to Lindsey.

_You got a fast car  
Is it fast enough so you can fly away?  
You gotta make a decision  
Leave tonight or live and die this way._

When the song ended, the bar's patrons applauded full heartedly.

He stuck out his hand before setting down his guitar. "I'm Lindsey by the way."

She shook it with a smile. "You have good taste in music."

"You ever do that before?" He followed her off the stage.

"Never in front of people."

Lorne approached them. "I can see someone's been keeping secrets"

Linds grinned. "Wasn't she great?"

He looked at her pointedly. "Unbelievable."

Lindsey glanced between them. "I'll let you guys talk in peace." He shook her hand again. "Don't be a stranger 'round here."

Coming over with the others, Wesley stood close to Buffy. "You were wonderful honey."

She leaned into him affectionately. "Thanks." Wesley kissed her forehead. Seeing her eyes close contentedly, Lindsey frowned a little.

Before Cordelia could comment, Angel pinched her.

"Ow!"

"I better go." Linds waved to Lorne. "See ya next week."

"Alright." Lorne sighed, "Let's sit." He chose an out of the way booth.

Noticing Lindsey's lingering eyes, Wesley held Buffy's hand and sat close beside her.

Cordelia opened her mouth to question, and Angel stomped her foot.

"Why are you being so mean to me?"

"Later." He grumbled, "I'll tell you later."

Lorne focused on Buffy. "Sugarlumps, you've got trouble ahead."

Angel frowned. "What did you see?"

Buffy met Lorne's eyes and read pain there, pain for her."You don't just mean Lindsey."

"You haven't seen the last of him, but he's not the worst of it."

Cordelia huffed, "Just tell us already."

He kept watching her with sad eyes.

His despair communicated with her gut. It churned with dread. "Can I stop it?"

He didn't answer.

Impatient, Angel growled, "Lorne."

Breathing deeply, Lorne closed his eyes, and slowly, he shook his head.

Her gaze turned distant. "Then maybe I shouldn't know."

Lorne blinked his understanding.

Cordelia rolled her eyes. "Can you guys be more dramatic?"

Angel turned to Buffy. "We can't fight blind. We need to know what we're up against."

Feeling Wesley's hand in hers, she squeezed it. "I'd like to go now. I want to get back to my family."

He grabbed her jacket off the seat. "Of course."

They scooted out of the booth and walked outside.

Lorne reached for Angel's hand. "It's for the best."

Watching Angel leave too, Cordelia flung up her hands. "What did I miss?"

* * *

**The first song Lindsey sang is called _LA song_ by Christian Kane. It's the song Lindsey sang for Lorne in the series**

**The song Lindsey and Buffy sang together is called _Fast Car_ by Tracy Chapman. Christian Kane actually did a cover of that song for an album.**


	6. Chapter 6: You Have a Plan, Right?

**Chapter 6: You Have a Plan, Right?**

"What was that back there?"Angel grabbed Buffy's arm. "Why wouldn't you ask what's coming?"

Behind them, Cordelia frowned. "So you guys were faking being a couple?"

Wes sighed, "To discourage any romantic interest Lindsey may have developed, yes."

Hearing Angel yell, "Talk to me!", Cordy whispered, "Does he know?"

Wesley herded her past the arguing couple to the hotel.

Angel plead,"Tell me what you're scared of."

"This is my decision."

"But it doesn't make sense." Angel lowered his voice. "Since when do we _not _fight fate?"

Buffy kept her eyes averted.

"We've beaten prophesies, crossed dimensions and sure, sometimes we lose, but we always try." He pressed, "You've always tried."

"And when it comes, I will." She met his eyes. "You can bet on it."

He started to ask another question when Wesley yelled, "ANGEL!"

The couple ran inside and stopped dead in their tracks.

"Ello slayer."

Spike sat on the couch with Joyce and a cup of cocoa.

Lilly stood by them with Vincent in her arms. "Everything go okay?"

Joyce smiled. "Spike just dropped by to make sure everything was alright."

Angel looked furious.

Spike raised his cup of cocoa at the room. "If I'd known Joyce was moving up in life, I would have brought a housewarming gift."

Cordelia glanced at Buffy. "Want me to grab a stake?"

Wes added, "I have holy water."

Buffy raised a restraining hand.

Lilly furrowed her brow. "I thought he was a friend of Joyce."

Spike and Joyce replied simultaneously, "I am." "He is."

Buffy nodded. "It's alright Lil. You did the right thing. Go and return your grandma's call. I'm sure Myrtle is waiting up for it."

Watching Lilly pass him, Angel muttered, "What?"

"This is Spike! There's nothing right about him," Cordy yelped.

The big bad winked at her. "Thanks for noticing pet."

Wesley huffed off. "I'll go make sure Vincent is alright."

Hearing Angel crack his knuckles, Buffy remained calm. "It's been a while. I assume the blue honda is yours?"

Angel hissed, "You knew he was here?"

"'S not mine in the strictest sense, with someone nickin' Mrs. Summers, I made do." He smirked, "Grown a bit dodgy, have ya, love?."

Joyce nodded, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was leaving. I'm sure Faith would have though."

Cordelia grumbled, "I knew she was still evil."

Looking at Spike, Buffy smiled slightly. "You continue to surprise me." She frowned. "You're sitting in my house under the same roof as my mother and my son, and here you are, not even trying to get away."

"Your wha," He looked at where Lilly had been standing. "That was . . . he's - Bloody hell!"

"Cordelia." Angel looked at her pointedly. "Why don't you help Joyce get settled in some more."

Picking up his meaning, Cordy shepherded Mrs. Summers up the stairs. "How's the unpacking going?"

Joyce continued glancing back. "Is everything alright? They all looks so tense."

"Welcome to life with your daughter."

Buffy slowly approached him.

"I didn't touch him - never even held the lil boy. Joyce didn't say- I thought he was the bird's I swear." He squeaked, "I have a chip!"

"You know from Angelus you don't have to lay a finger on someone to destroy him."

"I-I"

She lay a hand on his cheek. "All you have to do is open your mouth."

Angel stood behind her. "Will, meet the mother lion."

His cocoa mug fell to the ground.

* * *

Lilly stared down at the closed office door. "What do you think she's doing in there?"

Wesley leaned against the railing next to her. "I haven't heard him scream yet."

Sipping a cop of blood, Angel stepped out of the kitchen. "Maybe she ripped out his vocal chords."

Wes thought he sounded hopeful. "And you wonder why she kicked you out."

"I don't wonder at all." He took another sip.

Lilly looked between the men. "Guys, Anne doesn't torture people. If he's still alive, that means she has a plan." Not hearing them argue, she clarified, "A non-bloody plan."

Wesley glanced over sympathetically. "Perhaps, you'd best wait with Mrs. Summers."

"Fine, but you'll see, she's not like that."

Calmly, Angel rebutted, "When _you_ were in danger, she was exactly like that."

"Slayers aren't diplomats," Wesley gently informed. "When threatened, your friend is prone to use violence. It's what comes most natural to her."

She shook her head. "She told me about that night. She isn't proud of it. She even apologized."

"To the demon?"

"To me and Sunny. She knows it was wrong."

Angel held his mug at his side. "And given a second chance, she'd do it again."

"You don't know that."

"I know she doesn't base her decisions on the fact she's a slayer. She bases them on love. I can't imagine her loving anyone more than Vincent. Can you?"

Lilly's eyes jumped to the office door.

Angel stared at it too. "She'll do what she has to."

Without another word, Lilly returned to Joyce's room.

* * *

From his seat, his knee began to shake, "So, what's the plan pet?"

Buffy turned off the office hot pot. "Don't know yet."

Watching her fill up two mugs, he frowned, "So we're what? Waiting till one pops in your head?"

"Hmm." She glanced at the clock. "It lives about twenty minutes away."

Spike's knee stilled. "The call to grandma was actually . . ."

"An SOS to a knowledgeable gypsy." She handed him a cup of cocoa.

Looking at the baby marshmallows, he mumbled, "You gonna put a soul in me?"

She sat in the chair next to him and wrapped fingers around her steaming mug. "Where's Drusilla?"

"Dru's dead to me." He poked at the white gobs. "Not dusty dead, if that's what you're getting at."

"Last time I saw you two, you were headedin' for evilly ever after. What happened?"

"Blasted deal buggered everything." He shook his head. "She never forgave me for sidin' with you against Angelus."

Buffy smiled slightly. "So you chose to stick it to her by becoming a white hat?"

"Am not!"

She looked at her drink. "Faith says you're good in a fight taking on demons twice your size."

"Bet your - you talk to Faith?"

Frowning, she chuckled, "You think I could move mom out without Faith noticing?"

"I don't know what you're capable of."

"Ditto."

Spike thought he saw worry in her eyes. "Slayer, I'd never harm a tot - least of all Joyce's grandchild."

She considered him for a moment before narrowing her eyes. "What do you want?"

"Nothing." He lowered his voice, "I came to check on your mum. That's it."

"What do you want _from your life_?"

"I'm not understanding you."

"Do you want to go back to Sunnydale, or do you want to stay," She gestured with her cup, "here?"

"I'm-I don't-you feeling alright love?"

"I've seen magic make a dad forget he even had a family. I've no doubt Myrtle can make you forget Vincent. " She stared at her marshmallows. "but I'm not sure that's what you want." She nodded to herself. "You followed her here; you followed me here for a reason." She leaned back in her chair. "So yes, I'm waiting till the answer comes to me."

* * *

Cordelia folded her arms. "So she didn't kill him."

Joyce sighed, "Oh good."

Lilly sighed too. "I knew she had a plan." Seeing Cordelia's scowl, Lilly observed, "You look disappointed."

"Unlike _other _problems in our lives, this one had a permanent solution."

Lilly picked up her tone. "Did everything go okay tonight?"

Joyce took Vince from Lilly. "Buffy wasn't slaying was she?"

"Worse, she was singing with the enemy."

Lilly smiled. "She sang with Angel?"

Joyce calmed. "I didn't know he could sing."

"Angel's not the enemy." Exasperated, Cordy shook her head, "The real enemy was a lot easier on the ears. . . . his voice and that music -just whoa."

"Do you mean. . .?" Lilly frowned "Did you guys see Lindsey?"

"Saw, heard, and in Buffy's case totally flirted with."

Joyce shifted Vinny on her lap. "Buffy's involved with another vampire?"

"No." Lilly stroked Vince's head. "Lindsey's not a demon; he's a lawyer."

"Oh. Then why did Cordelia say-?

"She doesn't like his bosses. None of us do."

Cordy shrugged, "They're evil."

Joyce waved Vincent's little hand . "Well, you never know when a man might change. Maybe this Lindsey wants to do what Spike did and fight for the little guy."

Lilly's head tilted. "What's she going to do about Spike anyway?"

Rolling her eyes, Cordy huffed, "I don't know, but your friend is here and the downstairs smells like sulfur."

Joyce grimaced as her head began to ache.

* * *

"I'm not certain this is possible."

Buffy helped Myrtle mash the rest of the herbs. "I'm not asking you to create something from nothing. Just multiply what's already inside."

With her back to Spike, she whispered, "Dear, there might not be anything inside to work with."

"Maybe not, but I want to try."

From his position on the floor, Spike asked, "Figure out what I want yet?"

"To belong dearie." Myrtle sprinkled herbs over him while Buffy lit candles. "That's what we all want. The question is do you belong here."

Buffy sat one side of him and Myrtle sat on the other. They held hands above him.

Looking into Buffy's eyes, Myrtle's widened, "You have great power. You could have done this alone."

"My power is for other things." She lifted their hands. "Take what you need. I trust you."

Myrtle hummed.

Tapping his fingers restlessly, Spike added, "For the record, I don't trust either of you."

Buffy maintained eye contact with Myrtle. "Tell me to stop and we will; the memory spell is easier than this."

"Don't rightly know what 'this' is."A s Myrtle started chanting, Spike fidgeted, "Better not be sneaking a soul into me."

"This is you, Spike." Buffy breathed deep. "This is all you."

"Auhh." Spike gasped as his eyes watered. "This -AHHH- bloody." He gasped again. "Hurts." He alternated between groaning and growling.

"I know." She looked down at him. "Loving is painful."

"I don't- Aaowhh!" A tear streaked down his cheek.

Staring into Myrtle's eyes, she listened as Spike's screams grew louder and louder.


	7. Chapter 7: Preparation

**Chapter 7: Preparation**

"You should have called me."

Buffy smiled into the phone. "I am calling you."

"You know what I mean," Sunny grumbled. "I could have backed you up."

"I had enough backup last night; trust me." She sat down on the fountain. "Lilly make it over safe?"

"Her and Gunn are catching up now."

She smiled. "And he thought _living_ with a vampire was crazy. . . "

"He'll have to get it to judge," he sighed, "and good luck there."

Nodding, she sighed, "A special spell for a special vamp."

"Because of the chip?"

"Those soldiers did a number on him, but he's always been unique."

"So, no travel partners."

"Probably not."

"Just in case, we'll keep up patrols here for a while."

"Appreciated." Through the glass doors, she looked into the hotel's lobby.

"Things okay there?"

While Vinny sat on Joyce's lap, Spike made funny faces earning many a' giggle. She imagined Angel standing by with a scowly pout. "Things are _weird_, but I guess I don't have to worry about my mom feeling at home here."

"Really."

She chuckled. "I thought Faith was exaggerating, but my mom really is good friends with a vampire." She watched Spike hand Joyce a bottle. "Her first doctor's appointment is today and Spike is determined to come along."

"How's that work?"

"He said all he needs a blanket."

"He's trusting a piece of cloth with his life. . ."

She shrugged. "Apparently, he does it all the time."

"You meet the craziest vamps."

She heard the smile in his voice.

"But this means no solo hunting , right?"

"Right."

Opening the door, Cordelia called out, "Angel accidentally killed Spike, that's okay right?"

"Sunny, I gotta go."

"Good luck."

Buffy hung up the phone and followed Cordy inside. "Now, what's the problem?"

"The smelly undead thing wants to hold the baby."

Spike's eyes widened. "No I don't."

Wesley flipped through the business's calendar. "So that wasn't you with reaching arms."

"Joyce was getting tired."

Angel barely contained a growl.

Rolling her eyes, Buffy took Vinny from her mom. "Sorry about the chaos. The team doesn't always play well with others."

Joyce smiled softly. "It's alright."

"Spike, maybe you could help mom unpack some of her art."

He helped Joyce off the couch. "Come on love, you point and I place." As he passed Buffy, Spike muttered, "Maybe you could get a bloke some blood."

She nodded and ignored the others' stares. "Vinny, say ba-bye to the smelly man."

"Oi!"

"Cigarettes and bourbon - worst cologne ever."

Spike followed Joyce up the stairs. "You actually missed that bint?"

"She's never been an easy child."

"Hey!" Buffy called up to them.

Joyce chuckled, "But she's right. You do smell like a bar."

Without turning around, Spike grumbled, "Not a word, slayer. Not a bloody word."

She let them ascend the stairs in peace. When the pair was out of sight, she turned to the others. "I appreciate you looking out for Vincent."

Angel crossed his arms. "But . . ."

"No buts." She shifted her hold on Vinny. "He's lucky to have you guys. We both are."

Wesley surmised, "You don't trust Spike either."

"I don't trust a lot of people."

Raising her hands, Cordy huffed, "Spike isn't people."

"Because he's soulless."

"Because he's Spike!"

Hearing Buffy sigh, Angel shook his head. "This isn't going to work."

"My mom likes having him around, and I support anything that makes things easier for her."

"He's dangerous."

She caressed Vinny's cheek. "I know."

Cordelia stammered, "I-I. We-e-"

Angel uncrossed his arms. "Is this about what Lorne said?" His face turned cross. "Or, more like, didn't say?"

Buffy kept her eyes on Vince.

Wesley read into her silence. "You know what's coming, don't you?"

She didn't deny it.

Angel's expression darkened. "Feel like sharing with the rest of us?"

She looked to the ground. "When the time comes, Spike could be useful."

"Buffy."

Cordelia interrupted the glare fest. "I am psychic, remember? One with the visions? If the world is ending, I'm gonna see it."

Angel continued glaring, "If you won't have your future read, then I'll have mine." He stomped off to the basement.

Cordelia chased after him, "You know, Caritas isn't open yet." She looked down the stairs. "The sewers, really?"

The door closed behind her leaving Buffy and Wes in a silent lobby.

"I did some research while you were away."

"More looming doom?" She put Vinny in his bouncy chair.

"His name is Dr. Fields." Wesley handed her a business card. "He's an oncologist who specializes in gliomas, brain tumors."

She straightened.

"You said the CAT scan revealed just a shadow, but if today's biopsy proves it cancerous, I've already told his office to expect the results. The quicker she gets into treatment the better the prognosis."

Stunned, she stared at the card. "How?"

"Lilly received updates from you, and she passed them onto me. I just wanted to know how I could help."

She met his eyes. "I- thank you."

"This is the doctor men like Quintin Travers trust with their lives. A former associate of mine was able to put me into contact."

"I have mom's insurance information upstairs, but even if they won't cover it," She glanced at the card. "I read about him. He's one of the best."

"I can take a look at her policy and find out what documents the company will need to proceed."

"Documents?"

"Test results, pathology reports, etc."

She nodded.

"If you don't mind me asking, why didn't you say anything? Angel thinks you're spending the day with Cynthia."

"I am." She grabbed the car seat from under the counter. "She's going to help me with Vince."

He narrowed his eyes. "You're spending the day at the hospital."

Buffy sighed, "And that's not Angel's territory. Fists and spells he can do, but this . . . . I don't want to look across the waiting room and see someone feeling as helpless as I do. We have so much power, Wes, but this isn't something we can fix."

He watched her place Vincent in the car seat. "Do you want me to drive you?"

"Cynthia doesn't get off work until later, so actually, you coming would be a big help; that is, if you don't mind riding with Spike."

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm not even going to ask." From behind closed eyes, he heard her laugh float up the stairs.

"Time to go people!"

* * *

"_This_ is Lindsey's new case?!" Lilah Morgan barged into the conference room waving a folder.

After a few words, Mr. Manners hung up the phone. "Do you mind closing the door?"

She nodded and complied.

"Now, Ms. Morgan, how can I help you?"

Rebuked by his tone, she fidgeted. "I don't mean to question you sir, but I thought our goal was to keep McDonald away from Angel."

"Our goal is to deliver results for the senior partners. As head of the project, you couldn't do that."

"Turning an ensouled being into a warrior for the apocalypse is a complicated process - even if the being is a vampire."

"Lilah, Lilah, Lilah," He stood up and walked towards her. "We corrupt souls all the time. It's what we do."

"And I can do it with more time."

"You're a bright girl, but you're not a creator." Leaning against the desk, he folded his hands in front of him. "Placing you in charge of a new project was my mistake. Countless cases could benefit from your detail oriented mind set. You should be closing deals. Leave the start up to others."

"Mr. McDonald isn't the only one with big ideas; he is, however, the only one with a personal conflict."

He folded his arms. "And what conflict are you referring to?"

"His wife and son are intimately connected to the subject. More so, now that they're living with him."

"McDonald doesn't have a wife or a son - not to his knowledge anyway. What he does have is a keen interest in taking on one of our division's most interesting challenges."

She bit the inside of her cheek. "I thought you said corrupting souls was easy."

"You were right; Angel isn't just any soul. Making him into an asset will require the imagination and dedication which only youth can fuel." He walked towards the door. "Who knows? The aforementioned ties might actually aid him. Angel will have to play nice to keep on Ms. Steele's good side." He smiled smugly, "By hiring Angel to protect his family, Lindsey gave him the most beautiful vulnerabilities."

"Sir?"

He put his hand on the door frame. "Our righteous champion coveted another man's wife and now dreams of being father to Lindsey's son." He considered the wood beneath his hand. "Without even realizing, Lindsey's been corrupting him since the beginning." He looked at Lilah. "You'll stay involved of course to protect our investment. We paid a pretty penny to clean his mind; make sure is doesn't get tainted again." He walked out closing the door behind him.

Gritting her teeth, Lilah let her hand crush a page of the file._ I hate this vampire._


	8. Chapter 8: For the Sake of Love

**Chapter 8: For the Sake of Love  
**

Vincent threw down a toy and Spike reached for it.

Warily, Cynthia watched him, "You ate something_ before_ right?"

He looked up from the plush duck. "You think Anastasia would leave her son with a feral vampire."

"Her name is Anne."

"Whatever blondie calls herself, she's not completely daft."

She took the duck from him. "But you are a vampire . . ."

"Let's just say Spike had a trip to the vet and now he doesn't chase the other puppies anymore."*****

"You didn't answer my question."

"Yes, I had my breakfast, and in this handy thermos, Annabelle packed my lunch and dinner, so quit worrying about me eating people."

"The name is Anne."

"Like I said."

"So it doesn't bother you being in a hospital."

"This isn't the emergency room, pet. They're sick not bleeding. Diseased flesh isn't my cup of blood."

"This is so weird." She watched Vince throw the toy. "I've never hung with a demon before - except Angel of course."

Spike handed the duck back. "I'm nothing like that poofter."

"And you're all British and stuff, cool."

"I take it back. The bird has lost it. She's having me watched by the babysitter."

"I'm supposed to be watching you?" She frowned. "What if you have to go to the bathroom? Do vampires go to the bathroom?"

"Shouldn't you be worrying about Joyce or something?"

She shifted Vin to her other arm. "Why?"

He sputtered, "It's a serious test she's having."

"Sure, but it's just a test. It's not like she's going to croak on the table."

Laughing, Vinny threw the toy back down.

Spike muttered, "And people worry 'bout _my_ influence on lil bit." Instead of handing it back, Spike teased Vin with the duck. "Your mum might have to do a heart spell on you too one of these days."

Giggling, Vinny tried to grab the duck. Against vamp reflexes, he didn't have a chance.

* * *

"I'm glad you're here." Buffy leaned against a wall.

Sipping the hospital coffee, Wesley grimaced. "Like I'd leave you with naught but a psychopath for company."

"Spike's not a psychopath."

"Both he and Vincent are responsibilities you have to monitor. Even Cynthia counts as someone under your care." He stirred the dreadful liquid. "My point is, you needed another grown up here."

"I just left my baby in a room with a demon in a building full of disease; I'm not feeling very grown up right now."

He leaned back against the wall too. "If you thought for one second he was in danger, he'd be elsewhere."

She sipped her coffee without grimacing.

"You're doing the best you can; the truth is we're all - what's the Yankee phrase - 'winging it'?"

She smiled.

"No one has all the answers - not even your mother."

"Are your parents still alive?"

He stared into his coffee. "My father."

"I'm sorry."

"I wish I could say I missed her, but memory fails me. What I miss is the idea of her."

She nodded. "I've been on my own for years, but the idea of not having a mom - I'm not handling it well."

"Has someone informed Mr. Summers?"

"Mom said she told him; she even mentioned the move but . . . " she shrugged, "Don't know what I'd say even if he did show. 'Hey dad, remember the daughter accused of killing people?'"

A passing nurse scowled at them.

"I'm no stranger to paternal disappointment."

Reaching for his hand, she lay her head on his shoulder. "If you're as good a son as you are a friend, he's blessed to have you."

Smiling softly, he squeezed her hand. "Should we get back to your squabbling companions?"

She sighed dramatically, "I suppose."

After pulling her away from the wall, he expected her drop their connection. Instead, she kept her hand in his as they walked side by side.

* * *

"You don't make any sense." Angel sat on end of the stage hanging his head.

"Sorry Angelcakes. Your destiny doesn't have everything hers does and vice versa."

He stood up. "Maybe a different song."

Cordelia banged her head on a table. "This. Will. Never. End."

Lorne sleepily sipped his coffee. "You've sung everything in the song book, and the picture isn't changing."

Angel flipped through the CDs backstage. "We're in each others' lives. If she's in trouble, how could I not be meant to help?"

Lorne started making a cold compress for Cordy. "Here you go buttercup."

Nodding gratefully, she whispered, "Has he gone crazy?"

"No," he sat beside her. "He's just scared."

Angel called out, "You have to have another song book!"

Lorne watched the stage. "I don't blame him. His sunshine's future isn't bright."

"Is she going to die?"

He frowned. "I don't know."

"And I'm really not going to get a vision about this . . ." She looked skeptical.

"Sugar, you see only what the PTB want you to see." He scowled into his coffee. "There's no reason they'd want you to see this."

"Because there's nothing we can do yadda yadda."

"Here's what I can do." Lorne called out, "Sweetie, how 'bout you come out here?"

Angel returned with hands full of discs.

"I can't give you spoilers to Annie-pie's fate, but if you're worried about William the Bloody, bring him by and I'll read his evil status for ya."

He put the CDs down. "I know songs - I remember some." Angel's began singing with an Irish brogue:

_I have often heard it said from my father and my mother  
That going to a wedding was the making of another  
Well if this be so, then I'll go on without a bidding  
Oh it's kind providence won't you send me to a wedding.  
For it's oh dear me, how will it be  
If I die an old maid in a garret._

Cordelia pressed the compress more tightly. "I remember him being cool once."

"Our boy is humbling himself for the sake of love." He smiled at the stage. "There's nothing cooler than that."

* * *

Barricaded in thought, Buffy stood before a hospital window.

Her group could see her in the hallway, but no one approached.

Spike sat with his head in his hands while Cynthia rocked Vincent in his carrier.

Hands in pockets, Wesley watched the sleeping child.

The sun shined bright outside and time moved slowly.

The staff went about their day; patients came and went. The hospital hummed with life and Buffy stood still as a statue.

When the sun went down, Spike folded his blanket. Cynthia fed Vinny a bottle when he cried. The table became littered with coffee cups and packets of nicotine gum.

Still, Buffy didn't move. She let the night's lights entrance her.

Out of the corner of her eye, movement caught her eyes. She looked in time to see Wesley pointing the doctor in her direction.

Dr. Azamov approached with a weary expression. She reassured, "Everything went fine; she's being moved into recovery now."

Buffy stayed facing the window. "Do we have the results?"

The doctor sighed, "The shadow is indeed a tumor, a low-grade glioma. It's a oligodendroglioma meaning it's located in the left hemisphere of the cerebrum. In this case, the tumor seems to have started there, so it hasn't spread from another part of the body." Dr. Azamov lowered her voice, "We caught it early. Unfortunately, though, things may progress very quickly."

"As in treatment?"

She clarified, "Symptoms. She may experience anything from loss of vision or appetite to lack of muscle control, mood swings . . ."

"We'll need the results for the doctor."

"She has a physician here?"

Buffy shook her head."Cedars." She frowned trying to remember, "Dr. Fields."

Azamov nodded. "Your mother should wake up in six or seven hours. In the meantime we are working on determining if the tumor's operable. You and your family should get some rest. We'll call you when she's awake." The doctor turned around when Buffy called out.

"Doctor," For the first time, Buffy met her eyes. "Thank you."

Dr. Azamov nodded and walked away leaving Buffy to watch her departure.

Once it was clear their interaction was over, Wesley cautiously approached.

"How is she?"

Buffy frowned at the ground. "We're going to need that doctor."

"Alright, I'll call him straightaway."

She nodded.

"And how are you doing?"

Her face scrunched on the verge of tears. "I've been out of her life for so long, I can't leave her now."

He touched her arm and stepped forward.

She leaned into him for a hug.

"Do you want me to drive Vincent home?"

"Can you take him and Cynthia to _Sanctuary_?" She murmured against his shirt, "Lilly said she'd watch him if this ran late."

He nodded his head over hers.

"Thank you."

Her hair smelled like vanilla. "I can come back."

She stepped out of his embrace. "I think I need to be alone right now."

He glanced at the waiting room. "And him?"

She watched him watch her knowing he could hear. "I can be alone with Spike here."

Wesley squelched the impulse to argue.

Through the hall, they walked back together.

She didn't hold his hand, but he felt close to her heart, and that was new.

* * *

***Line originally used in Buffy Season 4 episode 8 "Pangs"**

**The Song Angel sings is called "Old Maid in a Garret"**

**Lines about Joyce's illness paraphrased from Buffy Season 5 episode 8 "Shadow"**


	9. Chapter 9: Secret of a Warrior

**Chapter 9: Secret of a Warrior**

Angel yelled into his cell. "What do you mean she's not there?" He punched the vampire in front of him with his free hand.

"Don't worry man, Lil and I got Vinny tonight."

The vamp flipped onto one of the alley's dumpste.

Taking a kick to the face, Angel He gritted out, "Where's Anne?"

Gunn looked to Lilly for help. "Uhh. . ."

Angel kicked the dumpster with all his strength. "Gunn!" The vamp rolled onto the ground.

Gunn read off a message, "She's safe and she'll sock you later" the phone rattled, "mmph- talk, she'll talk to you later."

Angel dropped the phone to pick up a wood plank. Charging forward, he impaled his opponent's whole chest. When the vampire turned to dust, Angel fell face forward on the pavement. Wiping himself off, he returned to the phone with a growl. "Put Lilly on."

"Orders are clear and Lilly scares me a lot more than you do."

The back door to the shop opened. "Merve!" Two imposing vampires came out scanning the alley for their third.

"Right." Angel picked up his abandoned axe off the ground. "I'm not scary at all." He hung up the phone as the grimy vamps spotted him.

* * *

"I still go bumpy in the night." Spike watched Buffy try to doze, "so why you being nice to me?"

Eyes stayed closed. "All the feelings you burried, I made them all you'll ever think about. Doesn't sound so nice."

"Most wouldn't have bothered." He looked at his hands. "-wouldn't think I even had feelings."

"Then most don't know you."

Tilting his head, he narrowed his eyes. "And you do?"

She lolled her head so she could look at him. "I know you cared about Drusilla . . . and my mom." She looked to the ceiling, "if rumors are true, even Faith."

He guffawed and harrumphed. "You know, your mate is a sociopath, right?"

"Faith?"

He frowned. "The babysitter."

"Oh." She closed her eyes again.

"Oh?" Eyebrows raised. "You have a mental watching your spawn and you're not concerned. She practically admitted to not caring 'bout Joyce!"

Combing her fingers through her hair, she pushed her hair back. "Cynthia thinks it was a mistake bringing her here."

"Doesn't like hospitals?"

She smiled sadly. "Doesn't trust parents - not when their kid ran away."

His face darkened."Your mum is a fine lady."

She nodded. "Cyn and I left for different reasons." She sat up. "But she's right about one thing: there's a reason I haven't see her till now. Maybe sickness shouldn't change that, but it did." She looked at the closed surgery doors. "Nothing else seems important. . . . not even staking the Big Bad."

He smirked. "Thanks for that luv."

"You've never been a typical vampire." She met his eyes straight on. "For better and worse."

Her eyes told him she wasn't talking about the past. Spike wasn't privy to the knowledge he sensed in her gaze.

One thing was certain: the slayer wasn't a child anymore. Tilting his head, he tried to suss out exactly what she'd grown into, but her gaze shuttered leaving him with nothing.

Bugger all, the woman before him knew how to keep a secret.

* * *

Leaning against the kitchen counter, Gunn watched Lilly feed Vince."Taming a vampire, now lying to Angel - your girl has gone crazy."

"I'd say her life has gone crazy."

"And I thought I was keeping it quiet."

Sunny walked in to grab a soda. "Talkin' bout Anne again?"

Lilly frowned. "Thought you'd be home by now."

"Been listening to the scanners with the boys."

Gunn crossed his arms. "Why?"

He sipped his drink and looked at Lil. "You still doing that party?"

"For the donors, yeah."

Gunn's eyes bugged. "That's in like three days."

"She told me not to cancel it." She wiped Vince's mouth clean. "We need face time with the contacts Linds set up or they forget about us." She shook her head. "We can't put this off."

Gunn looked incredulous. "Anne gonna be there?"

"Wesley too."

Sunny lifted his drink. "I'll stand watch at the hospital."

Standing straight, Gunn looked between them. "Looks like you got it all figured out."

Sunny didn't disagree.

Hearing him feel left out, Lilly reached for him. "Gunn."

"Don't let me hold you back." He dodged her touch. "You guys got big plans in the works."

Sunny nodded. "Find a way to be helpful or find your way out." He dropped his soda in the trash and moseyed out calling back, "Wouldn't want you goin' crazy."

* * *

Buffy sat beside her mom on the hospital bed. "You sure you're up for the move today?"

Joyce held her hand. "I don't have much of a choice."

"We could wait till tomorrow. Your surgery isn't till the day after."

Frowning, Joyce looked distracted. "I don't think I can stay here just waiting."

Sitting away from direct sunlight, Spike called from the corner. "You'll be waiting wherever you are. "

Joyce didn't reply.

Buffy followed her mom's gaze to her hand. Even with slayer healing, her hands still bore the scars from burns she received fighting an army of boiling demons by herself.

"I meant to ask before, but I keep forgetting." Joyce brushes her thumb over the hard, uneven surface of her daughter's hand. "I thought you were safe here."

Spike scowled. "The girl is a warrior; she's never going to be safe."

Ignoring him, Buffy waited till her mom looked up. "Do you remember after dad left and you started working later and later?"

She nodded.

"You were so tired some nights you said you caught yourself falling asleep on the drive home." Putting her scars on display, she covered their hands with her free one. "Well, after my husband left, I wanted a distraction too. We're both lucky to have survived."

"I'm sorry honey."

Spike raised his brows. "That might do for mummy dearest, but how about a real explanation." He glanced at her hands. "Before seeing those, I didn't even think slayers could scar."

Someone knocked on the open door. "Is this a good time?"

Glad for the interruption, Buffy turned to see a pregnant Gemma carrying Vincent. "There's my little guy."

Gemma handed over the carrier. "Cynthia had to work."

Taking in her second trimester belly, Joyce frowned, "You didn't drive yourself did you?"

"Sunny is circling the block now."

Buffy unstrapped Vince and picked him up.

Spike rolled his eyes. "Do you often lose track of the pup?"

Gemma said goodbye and Buffy continued back to her seat. On her way, she stepped on Spike's blanket sliding it into direct sunlight and out of Spike's reach.

"Oi!"

A thick stream of sunlight divided them.

"Guess you don't get baby time."

Spike huffed, "Just sayin' does well knowing who's got lil' bit."

"And I'm just putting you on time out."

Joyce smiled at his pout. "I certainly won't lack for entertainment." Suddenly grimacing, she put a hand to her head.

"Headache?"

"Just a little one." She smiled through the grimace. "A biggish little one." At Buffy's concerned expression, Joyce waved her hand. "I'm fine. Now, come on, let me see my beautiful grandson."

Buffy handed him over.

Spike grumbled, "M' guessing the stranger didn't bring over other necessaries."

"She did, but it'll have to wait."

Following the direction of her nod, Spike saw a small cooler by the doorway . . . on the other side of the stream of sunlight. He could smell the blood inside.

She pulled out a bottle from the baby bag. "Like you said, baby comes first."

* * *

Buffy leaned against the coffee machine staring at her phone. Night was approaching and she really should talk to Angel. He deserved honesty. She's promised it to him.

Still, she didn't dial.

"Annie?"

Coat on his arm, Lindsey approached.

She stayed leaning. "What are you doing here?"

"Just came from my doctor. What are-"

Immediately, she stood straight. "Are you okay? What happened?"

He touched her arm. "I'm fine." Seeing her sigh with relief, he continued, "I took a knock to the head a while back, so I come in from time to time and make sure a few memories were all I lost."

He looked to the baby carrier by her feet. "And who is this little guy? Yours?"

She nodded.

"Don't tell me the the lil' sheriff caught something." When she didn't answer, he looked back at her. "Anne, are _you _alright?"

She shook her head. "I- I had to bring my mom here for surgery. Apparently, this is good-doctor land."

"It is." He assured her, "Whatever she needs, you're in the right place for it."

His earnest voice captivated her. For a moment, things were familiar. Linds had her back, they were a team, she wasn't alone in this and . . . then the feeling broke; their moment ended

He frowned and looked away. "Well, I should be getting home."

"Of course." She stepped aside.

"It was good seeing you again. You and your mother take care."

She leaned back against the machined - phone still in hand. She felt like she was going to be sick.

Vinny started fussing.

"I know buddy." Squatting down, she started distracting Vince with a toy. While he tried to catch the dancing duck, Buffy dialed her cell. "It's me. I'm okay. There's some place I needed to be." She looked down the hall where Lindsey disappeared down. "Maybe you could be here too. Liam, I need a friend." She closed her eyes. "I need _you_." She breathed deep. "I _want_ you."

* * *

**Some of Joyce's lines were taken from Buffy Season 5 episode 8 "Shadow." This portion of the series is not far from ending. After the next chapter, some big actions are going to take place and all of the characters' lives will be affected.  
**


	10. Chapter 10: Adam and Eve

**Chapter 10:** **Adam and Eve**

Sitting in Monica's diner, Lindsey stared at his coffee and focused on the sun's heat through the window.

"I finally found the perfect dress for Saturday." Monica finished her eggs."It's red with this sashy thing that well - you're going to love it. It's nice to know what real money can buy."

Finally, Lindsey he met her eyes. "This isn't the right place for me."

She glanced around. "Well duh, it's a crappy diner. I've told you a million times you don't belong here." She smiled. "Does this mean I get to pick where we brunch next?"

"Monica," he frowned, "I don't think we should date anymore."

Not sure what he meant, she laughed awkwardly, "Because what, now that things are going well at work, you're too good for me?"

"What you said about destiny, you were right; it can't be forced. I just didn't give it enough time."

"You're not making sense."

He focused on her completely as he explained, "The night I met you, I was looking for something." His tone gentled, "This was close, but I was looking for somewhere else."

"You mean someone else."

When he didn't reply, her face reddened. "I can't believe this. You're crazy, you know that? All that talk about fate and soul mates and you're as shallow as the rest of them - chasing down the newest pair of legs." She glared. "No girl is gonna meet your expectations - not if she's human anyway." gave you a chance Lindsey. Get out of my diner."

Having already left money on the table, he grabbed his coat and walked away.

"Lindsey."

He stopped at the door.

"If there was a God, he wouldn't destine you for happiness."

He looked at her somberly. "I know." Head down, he walked out.

* * *

Lilah walked up to him adjusting his bow tie. "You shouldn't be going."

He glanced at her formal attire. "No, _you_ shouldn't be going. It's my case now remember?"

"And what does attending a charity benefit have to do with that?" Looping her arm through his, she walked them to the entrance. "Or is the key to turning Angel evil, you stalking his girl until he kills you?" Smiling, she squeezed his arm. "Because that is something I'd pay to see.

He squeezed back. "Whatever it takes to get the job done."

Smiling at the greeters, they made their way inside the beautiful ballroom.

He made note of the other guests. "A lot of heavy hitters are at this event. That in itself was a reason to check it out."

She watched him scan the room. "Looking for someone?"

He dropped her hand to head into the crowd.

With a frown, she took a glass of champagne from a passing tray. She drank deeply.

* * *

Sitting in the hospital chair, Buffy stared at her hands.

"Thinking about the benefit?" Angel sat beside her.

"I should be there." Her tone sounded far away. "It's a big night."

He nudged her leg with a cup.

"I've had too much coffee already."

"It's not coffee." He nudged again until she took the styrofoam cup.

Bringing it to her lips, she picked up the scent. "This is the kind Giles used to drink."

He looked into his own cup. "Still does."

She savored the scent nodding, "He was a good grown up: always knowing the right thing to say or do."

"I'm sure _he _doesn't feel that way."

Sunny walked in with Vinny and Spike. "Your boy's all changed."

Spike grumbled, "Vamp nose never lies."

They took their seats on the other side of Joyce's bed.

Buffy reached for Vince. "You check in with Lilly?"

Sunny handed him over, "And why would I do that?" Before she could answer, he continued, "If she needed something, she'd call me. She hasn't, so she doesn't."

"Thanks for waiting with me." She glanced at her mom again. "She won't wake for a while they said, but I couldn't be anywhere else." The longer she stared at her mom's bandaged head, the deeper she frowned.

"Love," Spike leaned in. "If you're likin' to worry about fixable things, how 'bout sparing thought for a cooped up vampire. Spot of violence could do you good too." Seeing her start to shake her head, he continued. "I'd even go for a patrol with the poof at this point."

She wavered.

Angel knew Spike wouldn't relent, so he rested his hand on her knee. "We won't go far." He removed his hand and stood.

Looking up at him, she whispered, "thank you."

He bent down and kissed her forehead. "We won't be gone long." He caressed Vinny's head before straightening. He glanced at Spike. "Let's see if we can't get you dead by sunrise."

Nearly bouncing off his seat, Spike followed him out, "Bring it nancy boy."

Buffy held Vinny closer.

Sunny tilted his head. "I can get an update from Lilly, if it helps."

She shook her head. "You were right. I trust she's got it handled."

* * *

"This is a disaster!" Lilly scream whispered to Wesley.

"Give me a moment. I'm sure there's a way it could be worse." He watched Lindsey walk through the crowd. "At least none of the kids who knew him are here tonight."

She turned her back on room. "Only because Anne thinks using kids as servers is exploitation." She folded her arms. "Seriously, _this_ is bad. _Him_ showing up tonight of all nights!"

"It's perfect timing from his perspective." Seeing her gape, Wesley turned her around. "Try not to think of him as Anne's stalker ex. Think of him as one of the many wealthy individuals who showed up to give money to your cause."

"I'm going to check on the food." Huffing she walked off.

Wesley looked at the slideshow shining on one of the walls. Pictures of_ Sanctuary's_ residents were interspersed with pictures of the facility and staff. The current slide showed Anne surrounded by muddy teens holding a football. The photo was older, taken before he met her. He idly wonder if Lindsey had been there that day-if he'd taken the photo or maybe was cropped out. As the slide changed, Wesley marveled at Anne's strength to have rummaged through her memories to put this together.

Marching forward, Wesley returned to mingling with the guests. He shook hands and smiled widely determined to represent Anne and the shelter well. To his relief, in the large-guest-filled room, he soon lost sight of Mr. McDonald. He was genuinely surprised when the lawyer appeared before him.

With a smile, Lindsey shook his hand. "It's good to see you again."

"I'm sorry, have we met?" Wesley's frown relented. "Ah, the karaoke bar."

Lilah approached them. "Wesley Wyndam-Pryce." Seeing both men's frowns, she smiled. "The firm knows Angel, the firm knows who works for Angel." She turned to Lindsey. "What we don't know is why we're wasting our time."

Lindsey put his hand on the small of her back. She could feel a blade pressing there. He leaned in affectionately dragging the metal edge against her flesh. "Why don't you get us some drinks, hmm?"

She nodded and stepped away.

Lindsey put returned his hand to his pocket. "She's a firecracker."

"Why are you here Lindsey?"

"So you do know who I am."

"You're a part of an organization which stands against everything my boss tries to protect."

"I don't know how she did it." Lindsey scanned the room. "A young woman without influence and here she filled the room with LA's upper crust - all human too which is no small feat." He looked at Wesley. "Oh, I know she's not here. With her mom's surgery today, I wouldn't expect her to be." He smiled at the room. "It's good to see what she's capable of."

"Anne has nothing to do with your firm."

"Can't help but wonder: Angel has saved at least a hundred damsels - some of them even pregnant; what's so special about this one?"

Wesley stared blankly.

"She's not a nobody that's for sure." He looked up at the slideshow. "She has the power to weaken a major player for the end times. That makes Anne and her son extraordinary."

Lilah returned with his scotch.

He raised his glass. "Look after our girl, Mr. Pryce." He walked through the room with Lilah at his side.

"You ripped my dress."

"Could have been your tongue."

"From being in charge of this project, I've gone to being in charge of you." Having picked his pocket, she dropped the razor in his drink. "If you're not on task, then I'm not on task."

Lindsey swirled the fatal concoction. "I've read your notes." He placed the glass on a passing tray. "You've considered everything from resurrecting Darla to old demon hunters."

"One demon hunter."

"Any one of those spells requires considerable resources, and none of them are guarantees." He raised a hand. "Don't get me wrong, they're diabolically brilliant, but Holland favors conservative investments. I pitched him a plan that needs only time, and he decided to save the money."

"Immortal beings can out-wait you."

"I'm lucky, then, that he's in love with a human."

She raised an incredulous brow. "You'd kill Anne Steele?"

"Even worse, I'm going to give her and Angel their happily ever after." He held out his arm and led Lilah outside. "He won't betray the Powers the Be because he hates us. He'll do it because he wants her." Stopping at the bottom of the stairs, he looked at the dark sky. "We let them build a life together and then offer him the chance to make it permanent."

"How does that get us what we want?"

"The story of Job is about one man withstanding Satan's harassment. The story of Adam and Eve, though, is about falling to temptation." He casually placed his hands in his pockets. "Satan separated two pure souls from grace with a simple suggestion." He looked into her eyes. "I may not be the original snake, but his soul doesn't have far to fall."

She stared at him. "And hers?"

"Whether he shares the apple is up to him." He frowned at the sky. "Whether she takes it, that's up to her."


	11. Chapter 11: Six Months Later

**Chapter 11: Six Months Later**

**Six Months Later**

Buffy punched through a gray spiky demon's nose, but she didn't have the luxury to see him fall. Two more demons reached her line of sight forcing her to duck to avoid their projectiles. Glancing at the fallen objects, she couldn't decide if they were knives or darts. Either way she knew better than to touch them. Any weapon that came out of a demon's own flesh was probably poisoned.

She dived behind a dumpster and instead, she picked up littered beer bottles. Breaking them against the metal, she jumped out the other side of the dumpster and threw them at the demons' heads. She hit them between the eyes taking them both down quickly. Seeing no more demons immediately after her, Buffy ran to a pile of cardboard. She rummaged until she found it: the car seat.

"Hi sweetie." The cut on her brow dripped blood on his blanket. "That's my good boy being so quiet for mommy." Through labored breathing, she still managed a smile. She picked up the seat and continued running down the alley. She kept looking behind her and prayed none of her enemies had superior night vision. She honestly didn't know how long she could keep this up.

* * *

Angel cleaned his weapons mindlessly. His attention kept fleeing to his last conversation with Buffy.

_**One Month Ago:**_

_Standing beside her, he looked down at her packed bag. "Going to Lilly's again?" _

_She nodded curtly._

_"You've been spending the night a lot there."_

_She added Vincent's duck toy to the bag._

_"Are you leaving me?"_

_He didn't think she'd answer, but after a moment, she sighed, "My mom wanted me safe." She glanced at Vinny. "She worried about us here. I'm starting to realize she was right. Everyone was right." Looking at a spot in front of Angel, she whispered, "I just didn't want it to be true."_

_"Buffy."_

_She met his eyes. "I know you want us." She searched his soul through his eyes and her eyes misted."You want redemption more." He didn't dispute the truth. Nodding, she straightened her shoulders. "That's not my fight, and we both know you probably can't win it without dying first."_

_"I would never let anything happen to you."_

_Looking down, she took his hand. "I have to do what's right for my family. You told me that." She let his hand go and turned away._

The end of an ax put splinters in his hand. Hissing, he threw the offending weapon across the room.

Wesley turned the page in his book."Give her time."

"I've given her time and space and I just. . ." Angel stared at the axe in the wall.

"She's grieving."

He surveyed the array of shiny weapons he'd spent all day working on. "I miss them."

Wesley looked up from his research. "She still hasn't reached out?"

As he dislodged the axe, Angel felt Wes watching him.

Wes observed, "Before the surgery, she'd been braced for her mother's death. When it went well and we all thought she was out of the woods . . ." He closed the book in front of him. "I wonder if it's better to lose someone early but be able to say goodbye than have time with them but no closure."

Angel returned to his tools and began sanding the axe's handle smooth. "Thankfully, we don't have to make that choice."

Wesley nodded and pulled another book from the pile.

* * *

Buffy stood anxiously by the pay phone. "Yes, I stole Gunn's truck. It's crashed, it's gone! Look I don't have time-" She tried to steady her breathing. "Lilly, listen! I need wheels _now_."

Vincent started to cry.

"I have to keep moving. Have Sunny meet me at Caritas." Out of frustration, she dented the phone booth with a palm strike. "If he doesn't know where that is, then get Gunn."

Movement in her peripheral vision sent her heart racing. "Just do what I said." Picking up the car seat, she dropped the phone and continued on.

It dangled by its cord as several figures followed her trail.

* * *

_**Two Months Ago**_

_Wearing his earnest expression, Spike asked, "You sure you don't want me to stay?"_

_Her tone warmed and softened. "You belong somewhere else. . . with someone else."_

_"Shirty bint does right fine without me."_

_Faith sauntered down the stairs. "Duh."_

_"It means a lot that you came for the funeral, but I'm betting there's some evil that needs you to stop it."_

_Faith smirked. "Always." She joined them at the door. "Not sure this one would be much help though." Her eyes turned serious. "I'm thinkin' you should keep him."_

_Quirking a brow, Spike shrugged, "Don't everyone ditch me at once now."_

_Buffy looked at Faith with somber eyes. "I made you a promise: that if you need me, I'll be there - no matter what." Her mouth tightened. " I can't break that promise but I don't know if I can it keep either." She caressed Faith's hair. "I'm hoping with Spike there, you'll never need me." With her hand on Faith's hair, she looked at Spike. In a whisper, she plead, "So don't make a liar of me, alright?"_

_He nodded once watching her carefully._

_Faith shook away eye-misting emotions. "Okay, where's the little lady's man? no way am I leaving without pinching those cheeks one last time."_

_Buffy smiled. "He's with Cordy in the kitchen."_

_Faith looked at Spike, but he shook his head. "Already had my goodbye with the tot."_

_She shrugged and hurried off to the kitchen. _

_When Faith was out of ear shot, Spike considered Buffy. "You're not long for this world, are you slayer?" Her silence made him glare. "Your mum's not buried a week and you're gettin' ready to die fighting."_

_She met his critical gaze evenly."If I need help, I've got a whole team here."_

_Her expression shuttered again, and he straightened. "Keep your bloody secrets then." He walked away huffing, "It'll serve you right if they end up killing you."_

_Instead of watching him leave, she looked to the ground and nodded to herself._

* * *

Lilly yelled into the hallway, "Sunny!"

From the radio table, Bernie held up two fingers and Dan added two more colored pins to an already colorful map. "She's got a ways to go on foot."

As soon as Dan scribbled something down, Cynthia took it from him. "Too far if they keep coming at this rate." She added it to her pile of notes and continued reading the computer screen displaying demon descriptions.

Sunny ran into the room. "What ya need?"

"Get Gunn and head to Lorne's bar. Anne needs her jeep." He nodded and sprinted out.

Covering a phone with her hand, Gemma hollered, "We know how to kill the orange ones yet?"

Cyn shook her head. "I'm still working on the spiky ones."

As Gemma apologized over the phone, Raquel whispered back at Lilly. "Where are they all coming from?"

Still holding the phone, Lilly stood guard in the doorway biting her nails. "We don't know yet."

Sunny ran into Gunn at the front door. "You're here. Good. Let's go."

"We know where Anne is?" He followed him down the stairs.

"She's headed to the demon bar."

The answer surprised him so much he bumped into a woman.

"Hey Gunn, Anne in there? Angel is still totally moped-out and-" She watched Sunny run passed her. "What's with the serious?"

"Cordelia, I don't have time-"

Sunny reached the jeep. "I'm gone man."

"Wait!" In spite of Cordy grabbing his arm, Gunn pushed forward. "You don't know where you're going."

"I have an idea." Sunny got in her jeep and started it.

"Sunny!"

"What's going on?"

"Sunny!" His cries were useless; Sunny was already pulling out.

"Gunn, talk to me." Cordy shook his arm. Should I call Angel?"

Seeing her reach for her phone, Gunn batted her hand down. "No!" He tried to calm himself. "No. If you want to help, that's not the way - not this time."

"I'm really going to need a reason." When he didn't answer right away, she marched up the steps calling out, "Anne!"

Gunn sighed and followed her back inside.

Lilly spotted them from her post in the office doorway. "What are you still doing here? Anne needs a car like yesterday."

"So she can crash another one?"

Cordelia's eyes widened. "We should so be calling Angel."

Lilly ignored her. "Gunn-" Something inside the office grabbed her attention and she abandoned them.

Gunn stopped Cordelia before she could follow her. "Your boss is being watched by Wolfram and Hart. You call him and whatever chance we have of fixing this is gone."

She begged pitifully. "What is 'this'?"

His expression turned grim. "Best we can figure, someone put a bounty on Anne and Vince." Cordy's gasp gave him time to continue. "Maybe it was the lawyers, maybe not. If it wasn't, they could make things a lot worse." He glanced at the office. "And tonight, that's a hell of a thing to imagine."

* * *

_**Three Months Ago**_

_"Charles Gunn."_

_Coming out of _Sanctuary_, Gunn turned around and found a man standing on the other side of the stoop."That sign saying 'everyone's welcome' is a lie. Lawyers got enough rocks to hide under."_

_Lindsey fell into step beside him. "As long as you're outside, I don't need to go inside."_

_"I got nothing to do with you."_

_"I'm assigned to Angel's case and he knows Ms. Steele."_

_"I don't have a lot." Gunn jerked to face him. "Including patience. Get to your point. Fast."_

_Lindsey smiled. "I'm going to give you an envelope, and you're going to give it to Anne."_

_No sooner had Gunn guffawed than he found himself back-against a wall with Lindsey's forearm at his throat._

_"Charles, I'm off the clock, and you're the only AI associate Wolfram and Hart isn't keeping tabs on, so I get to be impatient too." He released some of the pressure. "Now, you're going to deliver this envelope for the persuasive reason that if you don't, I will." He reapplied pressure. "And there's little my employers won't do to prevent that." He backed off some. "She needs this information to be safe." He took an envelope out of his jacket pocket and put it inside Gunn's. "And she can't get it safely without you." He patted the pocket, "So don't be an idiot." He stepped away._

_Gunn tried to hide his cough. "What do you care if a civilian is safe or not?"_

_Looking back at _Sanctuary_, Lindsey announced, "I'm leaving, and I don't want the destruction of a mother and child to be the last thing I contributed to LA." He met Gunn's eyes again. "I've got enough sins to carry as it is." He walked back to his car. "Don't forget about that envelope."_


End file.
